Okay so back to this bucket list.

Car was got, so I needed a holiday or 2. The main one that I won’t forget is a trip to Spain with Paul McHugh, Darragh Hughes, Brian Connolly and Fran Lowe. We stayed in Frans’ father’s house. It was on top of what I thought was a mountain. I could barely walk down a road, never mind hills! Poor Darragh ended up carrying me up one of them hills. Why I am telling you about this holiday and what the men with me still don’t know, is that my self-confidence was at an all-time low. I had a peg tube in my stomach and a Portocath in my chest wall, as all my veins had collapsed and it gave me my antibiotics. Now we had a private pool and for years I would tell everyone I couldn’t swim, which is the truth as I nearly drowned in Claremorris swimming pool once. But real reason was I didn’t want the lads to see my weaknesses. If you were to ask any of them they would tell you I was fine and they didn’t know about the peg tube. I saw this tube as a sign I was sick and I never accepted that I was sick.

My second holiday was a bit more complicated. I had been given 6 months until another meeting with Dr.Egan.. At this stage I was about 25% lung function, spitting blood, about 45kg and on steroids for Crohns disease. I knew in my own brain I wasn’t able for 3 weeks in America but 1 night I sat with Martina and her best friend Patricia with a little bottle of tequila. She supported me to go. We arranged a meeting with Beaumont on the Monday who gave me the green light. I went to Professor McElvaney and a doctor called CEDRIC, another hero. We got all the medication and had contacts for all hospitals in the area. I was set. I was off to Chicago but I took a little tour when I was there.

There is one story that will never be forgotten on that trip and mad to think I didn’t get flaked! We lived beside about 6 girls from Dublin and they would be drinking most of the time in our apartment. On one night out one of the girls found this guy and he was in the taxi with us. Fran was there too. In my state I decided I didn’t have enough room so I decided to head butt this stranger. Fran calmed it all down. When we got to the apartment I found out he was Martin McGuinness’ son. I continued to abuse the poor lad. If I ever find him I would like to apologize to the man. We laugh about it now but I am sure he is not.

There was another day when Fran wanted to put vodka in my nebuliser but I declined! I made the huge mistake of lying beside Colm Harney he dominated me like no other. You physically could not see my skeletal frame in the bed. They were good times and I don’t regret that holiday but I am sure none of them lads realized how sick I was. This was my second time in America. First time was 2006 an experience it involved a gay bar in NYC where a man came onto me a strange night in Boston where i got lost I met some great men, namely, Shane Boyle and Christopher Murrin, also known as Mooner and Baker. It was the year the lads played for Parnells and huge piss ups were had. Heads were shaved and Griffiths the fellow dance CEO couldn’t keep it done. If I had been fully fit I do think I would have competed in football longer and college would have been easier. And J1’s would have been a reality….. 3 months not just 3 weeks, but that’s the hand I was dealt and that’s what I played with! I don’t think I did a bad job in fairness