I was going to say over the past couple of months but that would be too short.

The reason I need to bring the topic of death up is because. It’s a thing that will essentially happen everybody. The only thing we don’t know about death is how or when!! I also need to talk about it as I have felt close so many times but keeping fighting back.

Since I have been seven (1993) the cruel disease cancer took the closest person to me away. My mother Maureen, I honestly think the worst part of this is, I never got to know the person that loved and cared for me, the woman that would see me grow up, I would have hoped she would have been proud, proud to see her kids develop in to marvelous people with great jobs and beautiful families. Her 8 grandchildren, see transplant save my life. It breaks my heart for one main reason. I will never know what it’s like to have your maternal mother to love and cherish you. We at home have seen the heartache our father went through. The pain of losing his loving wife. A man that had said goodbye to his own parents, brother and child at a very young age. Thankfully he met Olive when I was 12 and she has treated me and the rest of us with the kindness and loving a natural mother would bring. We will never knock the dub from her though!!!

On the other side of things, I seen my own sister lose her own child at birth Oisin. I will never forget my own father telling Maria that the hardest thing you will do is bury your own child. Her two lovely kids were playing the other day and Aoife turned Art and said wouldn’t it be great if we had Oisin with us here too. Life hurts but that’s what I love about my friends and family we are not afraid to talk about our troubles and past mistakes including what we would like to happen when we do pass away . Except poor Martina (wants pit bull, timber played while going “down”) I mean if you were to go into the details of my life I was never an angel. I would stay out for three days drinking, sleep in stranger’s house’s. Come home eventually and wonder what the fuss was about. My family just wanted me to be happy. As long as I’m happy they are.

If we look at the past few years and the amount of young people that have died for whatever reason. People that a lot of us talked to and thought they are great fun and a nice person but do we know what goes on in that persons head? Some had a gift of bringing a smile to a room by just arriving and some would light up a football field in the blink of a eye. But for whatever reason. They have been called to other places they are needed and all that is left is a void in our hearts. A void that’s virtually impossible to fill. I was asked on mid- West if I feel that I have had it tough and there is no denying I have but I have the opportunity to move forward. I was hit by a brain hemorrhage and here I am at 2 am writing about life. If life is supposed to be fair, I am the one people should have grieved over. Left my family and friends heartbroken. And all you would hear was “He was a fighter.”

I find it very hard to think of grieving families. The pain and hurt is unimaginable. I will admit I once said to a friend about a relative that died. It’s okay he was over 90. Was that the right answer? No, death is what it is. Final!! Like the poor 28 year old that gave me the gift of life. His parents have some comfort in knowing there is 5 people living. It truly is the gift of life. The only thing I can say about this is please please please think of your wishes in life and go live them. You only get one shot. Make the most of it. #livelifegivelife